Draw with me Mommy

Braden loves to draw. And not just sporadically – daily. I know that if we are going out to eat I should bring paper and markers. The color wonder paper and markers have been a dream to me. If you don’t know what they are, then I highly suggest you look it up. The only problem I have with them, is that sometimes my son will take a bite right off the tip and then exclaim, “uh-oh”…as if he doesn’t know how that happened! But anyway…back to drawing.

My son doesn’t care to watch TV for more than 10 minutes at a time. Which sounds really great on paper, but when you’re in a bind and need to get dressed – 10 minutes isn’t going to cut it! He likes to hop around and do different activities. And he really is quite great at playing by himself. But lately, he’s been asking me to draw with him. It’s nothing new, but the frequency and insistence on doing so has grown. I’m more than likely always about to do something that keeps me from being able to draw with him. He never seemed to really mind when I told him I had other things to do first. But today, today was the day I saw a little sadness wash over his face when I told him I had to dry my hair.

His little arms went so quickly to his side, he turned around, faced the table and hung his head towards his toes. My heart felt sad. He felt defeated. I could tell. He, with the sweetest face and innocent eyes looking up at me to draw. And I said no, for the hundredth time.

I’ve never dried my hair so quickly in my life. At some point during the hair drying process he ran into my room and shut the door. Frustrated with me I’m sure. He never said a word, but he didn’t have to. I just turned on the baby monitor and watched him as he had his moment to himself. After I was finished, I put the hair dryer away. Just as I was getting ready to walk in my room to get him, he came barreling out of the room in rush. He had the biggest grin on his face as he reached up to touch my hair and said, “dry!”. I’m smiling now just thinking about it. How much he knows and is aware of is still a shock to me. His little brain is this huge sponge that just takes everything in. I love it. I love him.

And so after I told him yes, my hair was dry and we can draw now. We did. I sat on the chair that is about as big as my hand, and drew and drew and drew. It was then followed by a tickle fight and lots of kisses. I wish every day could be this sweet and simple. I hope that I always remember to take the time to draw, because what could possibly be more sweet and simple than that?

I love you my buddy!

(21 months old)

xoxo

Your mama

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Draw with me Mommy

A midnight snack 

I had every intention as a new mom for Braden to sleep in his own bed. We bought the crib (off Craiglist) and had everything set up, ready to go. Even after attending one of those baby classes, his dad and I rushed home to remove the bumper… Because those were not allowed. We were ready. I was ready.

But, Braden had other plans. Braden did not want to sleep in his crib. He did not even want to sleep in his cradle. He didn’t want to sleep anywhere other than being cradled in the arms of anybody. 

I can remember the first night home from the hospital so vividly. His dad and I unable to sleep… And of course Braden crying. We had heard about the amazingness of a sound machine. I invested in one, and at about 10pm, the first night home we plugged it in. I remember Bradens dad holding Braden up to the machine, as if that in of itself would make him go to sleep. I am able to laugh at this image now, but at the time my hormones and emotions were all over the place, and i snuggled Braden back into my arms on the couch in the den. And there I slept for 2 whole months – with Braden safe and sound on my chest. I became the granola mom I never thought I would be.

Let’s flash forward to 20 months later. Currently, Braden is safe and sound asleep next to me in bed. If he had his way, he’d still be nestled ontop of my chest, in the crook of my arm,  or a hand tangled into my hair. He loves to snuggle. “Gungle” as he calls it. I do not. I’ve learned to love it, because that’s what my son loves. Remember, I’m a granola mom now 🙂 But, if I had my way, Braden would be safe and sound asleep in his own bed or crib in his room…

Well, that may not be all true. You see, as a mom to a very loving, sweet, sensitive and snuggly child, I’ve learned to be all of those things. Not necessarily to everyone in my life, but most certainly to him. It became this natural instinct of mine that I have embraced fully. But, that’s not to say I’m not looking forward to him sleeping on his own – because I am. But, I will be patient. I truly believe there will be a time where he lets me know, that he’s ready. So, until that moment happens we will sleep side by side. A snuggle here and there. A held hand here and there. How could I deny him such sweet and innocent gestures of love? 

Sometimes he’ll wake before I’m ready to jump into bed. I hear him rustling through the monitor, and then I see him sit up in bed. A slightly distressed, “mommy”, is called out. Eyes squinting… Barely open. I quietly enter the room and remind him I’m still here. That everything is okay. And whisper to him to lay back down on his pillow. I slowly crawl into bed with him and rub his little head. He nestles in warmly Inbetween our 2 pillows, holding out his hand for me to hold. And when I do, I see the tiniest form of a smile and a little sigh of relief – eyes still shut. I watch this feeling of comfort take over him. His little piece of a midnight snack. He feels safe. And that, makes it all worth it. 

I love you my little man, 

Your mommy xoxo 



A midnight snack